Not really.
But as counterproductive as it seems, before beginning writing this month, I allowed myself some written down ‘self love rules’ for this 31 Days thing.
1. I could quit.
2. I didn’t have to be posted ‘on time.’
3. I didn’t have to write for anyone or any reason.
4. I didn’t have to do anything particular or in any specific way, hence the category I chose.
5. I would write on days or nights that I felt compelled to AND felt like it.
Disclaimer, the teacher in me balks at all of these. The mom in me does the same. Yet, you see, I’m an all or nothing person and when tied in too tightly it’s a disaster in waiting. I, for one, don’t need any more disasters in my life.
Can anyone relate?
It’s a good thing I made this deal with myself, because there were nights where my eyes couldn’t distinguish between the hall light and the neighbors porch light. Other times the light was clear, but I was pretty frustrated with my own life and I didn’t want to share that in a bad light. Maybe once or twice I actually went to bed instead of sitting down to share something here. The Lord and I have a great prayer time going as I try to fall asleep each night-so that only meant more time with my heavenly Father. I need that most. And there was a night or two where I just didn’t want to write. There was no writer’s block, there was no big qualm over what I should (or shouldn’t) write about, I just didn’t want to…besides, I’m trying to learn to knit and crochet. Did you know you can actually do that (unintentionally) BACKWARDS? I know, cRaZy!!
Thank you for understanding. I would be on the losing side of this challenge had I given up the best for something good. We do that so often in our walk as Christians. My desire is to BE who the Lord wants me to be, sometimes the DO has to wait. Here’s a little sneak peek at what was drawing more of my attention. Maybe next time I’ll be ‘more perfect’ in the string of things, but– for the big win….it really didn’t bother me at all! Thank the Lord for making my life real vs really ritual. <3
Psaml 39:3ff …My heart was hot within me, While I was musing the fire burned; Then I spoke with my tongue: “LORD, make me to know my end And what is the extent of my days; Let me know how transient I am. “Behold, You have made my days as handbreadths, And my lifetime as nothing in Your sight; Surely every man at his best is a mere breath. Selah.…
I don’t plan on quitting my writing anytime soon, and I’m THRILLED to have so many of you reading along with me. I don’t know why you stopped by, but I’m happy you’re around.
